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Tuesday, September 5, 2017

AGORA (2009)

It’s an old punch line, but the Christians really are revolting in this misconceived historical from Alejandro Amenábar, still living off his overblown rep from SEA INSIDE/’04 (see below). Here, in a paradisaical 4th Century Alexandria, intellectual curiosity & free-spirited academia allow Professor Rachel Weisz, comely daughter of wise old Michael Lonsdale, to lead a motley class of ‘brothers’ (multi-cultural/multi-ethnic/multi-faith) in pursuit of high mathematics & higher celestial bodies. Modified rapture, if only Teach would return all the longing looks from her chaste, horny students. But even in this renowned library town, abstract studies may not survive the fast-coming saturation tipping-point of Fundamentalist Christian Terrorists.* (The religious cult in GAME OF THRONES has nothing on these guys. Indeed, quite the prescient GoT vibe here, particularly in the iffy CGI-enhanced settings.) And neither Roman Rulers, led by rebuffed former student Oscar Issac in his first lead, nor former/ favored freed-slave-turned-true-believer Max Minghella (son of director Anthony Minghella) can keep a lid on the radical faction. All happening just as Weisz is on the verge of discovering elliptical orbit. Yikes! The goofy charm of Major Film Folly hovers over much of this, with a Stateside trim keeping it just over two-hours. But the film probably needed to be either much, much better, or much, much worse to make a mark.

SCREWY THOUGHT OF THE DAY: *Amenábar tries hard to locate this ultra-strict/violent Christian sect somewhere between ISIS & the Nazi SS. But since we never see what they replace (only the enchanted closeted academic world behind library walls), the parallels don’t resonate.

DOUBLE-BILL: An early CinemaScope dud, THE EGYPTIAN/’54, has like concerns, but is too dramatically limp to take advantage of its handsome production & unique shared Alfred Newman/Bernard Herrmann score.

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