CAPTAIN ALATRISTE (2006)

Serious fun when not being serious, this deluxe Spanish Historical fiction (from a series of modern novels) follows unlikely Spaniard Viggo Mortensen (adding a mysterious element more obvious choices Antonio Banderas or Javier Bardem might have missed) in a ‘noblest soldier of them all’ scenario as he chafes at the iniquities of 17th Century Spanish society (royals, religiosos, retro rules) while staying true to all things Castilian, other than the lisp.  In a handsome production with an Old Masters’ look (think Velasquez), Alatriste is barely returned from noble fighting in an ignoble war against Protestant Flanders when he’s ‘enlisted’ to assassinate a couple of Dukes (Wales & Wellington) in from England incognito to visit the King, only to hold back from finishing the job.  The right thing to do, of course, but getting Alatriste into nothing but trouble, and setting the course for the rest of film on missions foreign & domestic; battles of heart, soul & territory.  Accomplished and nicely detailed at first, increasingly tangled political & personal issues in the film’s morally compromised second half find writer/director Agustín Díaz Yanes coming up short, his skills unequal to the task.  (Unlike Peter Weir’s MASTER AND COMMANDER out three years before this.)  Mixing old-fashioned duels and derring-do over twenty years (showing the merest touch of gray at the temples and nary a pound packed on) with uncomfortable societal attitudes toward women & religion treated in modern fashion as mere niceties everyone follows or ignores at the plot’s convenience.  Ultimately, the film wants to toma tu pastel y cómetelo también when issues get thorny.*   Something of a curate’s egg (an iris fade-out signals a decline), it’s conditionally enjoyable.

DOUBLE-BILL: As mentioned, MASTER AND COMMANDER/'03.  And what became of the presumed sequels?

ATTENTION MUST BE PAID: *Googled English-to-Spanish for ‘have your cake and eat it, too.’  Close to the mark?

SCREWY THOUGHT OF THE DAY: Full Official English title: CAPTAIN ALATRISTE: THE SPANISH MUSKETEER, but did this receive even a token Stateside theatrical release?