A $200 million vanity project. But whose vanity? Miscast star Robert Downey Jr., adding the vocal cadences of Anthony Hopkins to latter-day Johnny Depp mannerisms as the country vet who talks to the animals?* Is it Downey’s producer wife? It wasn’t co-writer/director Stephen Gaghan. He may have the face of a family-friendly pet and a past that leans toward self-important overinflated jollities like SYRIANA/’05 and TRAFFIC/’00, but he’s only a hired hand. Maybe it was the same group of Universal studio execs who Green Lit the equally horrid Live-Action Dr. Seuss reboots and thought Downey, after jump-starting the MARVEL film boom in IRON MAN over a decade ago, might do it again. As to development, first drop any resemblance to the gentle charm of the old Hugh Lofting novels, then make all the animals CGI pets so any surprise or wonder that they can speak the King's English will be lost. Not forgetting to add in one magic dragon with tummy ache. (Tie-in toys, don’tcha know.) Sprinkle liberally with reaction shots from two tagalong tweens (one upper/one lower class) to goose kiddie demographics. And you thought the good doctor, after a bust ‘60s musical and two flatulent modernizations from Eddie Murphy, couldn’t do any worse.
ATTENTION MUST BE PAID: *While the animals naturally have to be dubbed (cue the All-Star vocal cast), why dub Downey? He sure sounds entirely post-synched. A last minute re-loop to nail the accent?
DOUBLE-BILL/LINK: The old 1967 musical is an odd artifact from a perilous moment in movie studio history back when they were desperate to find another SOUND OF MUSIC cash cow. https://maksquibs.blogspot.com/2012/08/doctor-dolittle-1967.html
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